Photography Niche Blog

Urgent Women and Men Pregnancy Q and A?

admin — Fri, 30 Jul 2010 07:20:15 +0000

Q. Am I more likely to get pregnant if my husband wears boxers rather than briefs?

A. Yes, but you’ll have an even better chance if he doesn’t wear anything at all.

Q. What is the easiest way to figure out exactly when I got pregnant?

A. Have sex once a year.

Q. What is the most common pregnancy craving?

A. For men to be the ones who get pregnant.

Q. My blood type is O-positive and my husband’s is A-negative. What if my baby is born, say, type AB-positive?

A. Then the jig is up.

Q. My husband and I are very attractive. I’m sure our baby will be beautiful enough for commercials. Whom should I contact about this?

A. Your therapist.

Q. I’m two months pregnant now. When will my baby move?

A. With any luck, right after he finishes college.

Q. How will I know if my vomiting is morning sickness or the flu?

A. If it’s the flu, you’ll get better.

Q. My brother tells me that since my husband has a big nose, and genes for big noses are dominant, my baby will have a big nose as well. Is this true?

A. The odds are greater that your brother will have a fat lip.

Q. Since I became pregnant, My breasts, rear end, and even my feet have grown. Is there anything that gets smaller during pregnancy?

A. Yes, your bladder.

Q. Ever since I’ve been pregnant, I haven’t been able to go to bed at night without onion rings. Is this a normal craving?

A. Depends on what you’re doing with them.

Q. The more pregnant I get, the more often strangers smile at me. Why?

A. Cause you’re fatter then they are.

Q. My wife is five months pregnant and so moody that sometimes she’s borderline irrational.

A. So what’s your question, dipshit?

Q. Will I love my dog less when the baby is born?

A. No, but your husband might get on your nerves.

Q. Under what circumstances can sex at the end of pregnancy bring on labor?

A. When the sex is between your husband and another woman.

Q. What’s the difference between a nine-months pregnant woman and a Playboy centrefold?

A. Nothing, if the pregnant woman’s husband knows what’s good for him.

Q. My childbirth instructor says it’s not pain I’ll feel during labor, but pressure. Is she right?

A. Yes, in the same way that a tornado might be called an air current.

Q. When is the best time to get an epidural?

A. Right after you find out you’re pregnant.

Q. Is there any reason I have to be in the delivery room while my wife is in labor?

A. Not unless the word "alimony" means anything to you.

Q. I’m modest. Once I’m in the hospital to deliver, who will see me in that delicate position?

A. Authorised personnel only-doctors, nurses, oderlies, photographers, florists, cleaning crews, journalists, etc.

Q. Does labor cause haemorrhoids?

A. Labor causes anything you want to blame it for.

Q. Where is the best place to store breast milk?

A. In your breasts.

Q. Is there a safe alternative to breast pumps?

A. Yes, baby lips.

Q. What does it mean when a baby is born with teeth?

A. It means that the baby’s mother may want to rethink her plans to nurse.

Q. How does one sanitise nipples?

A. Bathe daily and wear a clean bra. It beats boiling them in a saucepan.

Q. What are the terrible twos?

A. Your breasts after baby stops nursing cold turkey.

Q. What is the best time to wean the baby from nursing?

A. When you see teeth marks.

Q. What is the grasp reflex?

A. The reaction of new fathers when they see a new mother’s breasts.

Q. Can a mother get pregnant while nursing?

A. Yes, but it’s much easier if she removes the baby from her breast and puts him to sleep first.

Q. What happens to disposable diapers after they’re thrown away?

A. They are stored in a silo in the Midwest, in the event of global chemical warfare.

Q. Do I have to have a baby shower?

A. Not if you change the baby’s diaper very quickly.

Q. What causes baby blues?

A. Tanned, hard-bodied bimbos.

Q. What is colic?

A. A reminder for new parents to use birth control.

Q. What are night terrors?

A. Frightening episodes in which the new mother dreams she’s pregnant again.

Q. Our baby was born last week. When will my wife begin to feel and act normal again?

A. When the kids are in college

My wedding photographer did not fullfil her contract. Now she won't return calls/add is bad. How do I sue her?

admin — Fri, 30 Jul 2010 00:01:09 +0000

She was paid in full oct 1 /08-wedding was nov. 1. She had a sub come in to take pics after bailing on the bridal photos as well. He was late and left early,now he wants us to pay him and she will not contact us. I don’t think her address is any good. Her name is Renee Bowes of Winston Salem NC don’t hire her! Nevaeh Photography ltd. is her "company" name. How can we sue her if we don’t have a good address. And, as we paid her and were under contract with her, how can he legally charge us? He was under contract with HER to take the pics as a sub, not with us.
I forgot to mention that we have attempted to send her a certified letter demanding a refund but it was returned

Vogue Bambini Inspired Childrens Photography by Moda Bambini Kids Photography

admin — Wed, 28 Jul 2010 23:05:00 +0000

More Vogue Bambini inspired kids photography: modabambinikidsphotography.com Whether you’re a fan of Vogue Bambini inspired childrens photography or you’re a parent in search of reliable photographers and accurate, unbiased information about child modeling, you will find Moda Bambini Kids Photography (.com) to be a valuable resource. “The top booking, most successful child models in Florida all have one thing in common - Moda Bambini Kids Photography.” Top Rated . Most Trusted . Most Recommended . Best in Children’s Photography . Miami . Miami Beach . Fort Lauderdale . Boca Raton . West Palm Beach . Orlando . Tampa . Florida (Out of state visitors welcome too.) modabambinikidsphotography.com

Tummies and Tiny Toes Photography

admin — Wed, 28 Jul 2010 01:23:00 +0000

- created Cindy Carter at animoto.com

Does anyone know of a good Frisco photographer for maternity, newborns and children?

admin — Tue, 27 Jul 2010 14:25:03 +0000

I am at 6 months and missed out on good newborn for my daughter (shes 2 now). I want someone thats fairly affordable, maybe new but has some skills. I googled Frisco photography and everything I like was too expensive. I have about a 0 budget.

HQRP Replacement AC Adapter / Power Supply for Sony CyberShot DSC-P150, DSC-P2, DSC-P200, DSC-P200/R Digital Camera - (incl. USA Plug & Euro Adapter) plus HQRP Black Mini Tripod

admin — Mon, 26 Jul 2010 03:36:35 +0000

Features:

HQRP Replacement AC Adapter with Power Cord plus Black Mini Tripod; Compact & Lightweight Design

Manufacturer: HQRP

Products trademarked HQRP are marketed and sold exclusively by Osprey-Talon. Compatible with Sony CyberShot DSC-P150, DSC-P2, DSC-P200, DSC-P200/R Digital Camera

Price: $9.91 USD

Buy Now

Little Cherry Blossoms_Spring Photo Shoot.wmv

admin — Sat, 24 Jul 2010 13:33:05 +0000

Baby boutique, baby photo shoot, baby modeling, baby store, baby gifts, boutique, photographers, photo shoot, baby store, kids store, childrens store, chicks and bunnies, chicks, bunnies, Easter, Easter photo shoot, Easter photo ideas, photo styling, Little Cherry Blossoms, Ogden Utah, Historic…

What do photographers charge for portraits?

admin — Sat, 24 Jul 2010 00:04:40 +0000

What are the average rates for Portrait, Children, Pregnancy, Headshots, Family, Animals

Photography by Farrah Plutschak Omaha Nebraska maternity portrait and wedding photographer

admin — Sat, 24 Jul 2010 00:04:34 +0000

Photography by Farrah Plutschak located in Omaha, Nebraska www.photographybyfarrah.com 712.310.6805

Baby Photography & Maternity Photography by Alisa Murray

admin — Fri, 23 Jul 2010 13:26:53 +0000

alisamurray.com This video shows Alisa shooting maternity photography session, newborn baby photography session and a magazine cover for Houston Family Magazine featuring Bill Balleza from KPRC Channel 2. Alisa explains the the artistic approach she brings to portrait photography. See what you can expect during your photography shoot.